A Health Anxiety Journey

Emma Mannering (she/her) - UNSW professional staff

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Emma Mannering

At the beginning of 2019, I was told I had health anxiety. After an uncountable number of times presenting to the emergency department convinced my lung had collapsed (when it had not), a very kind emergency doctor suggested I see a psychologist for anxiety attacks. This was strange to me because no one had ever suggested I see a psychologist.

I had anxiety before the lung issue, but I was very social and never said no to any event. However, at the peak of my anxiety, I was so worried about getting sick that I avoided going out or being around people in case I got sick.

I convinced myself that I had a range of rare illnesses, and that the worst-case scenario was lurking around the corner and I obsessively self-diagnosed. I also got stuck in a loop because my anxiety made me experience physical symptoms which gave me more reasons to see a GP.

I felt guilty because I saw people close to me who were sick with cancer or chronic diseases, and I knew I wasn’t actually sick. Due to this, I felt like I didn’t deserve support, but after talking to a psychologist I was able to let go of that guilt and realise that I had a genuine need to talk to someone about the anxious thoughts I had about health. Afterwards, I stopped googling everything and rebuilt some trust with my doctors.

I’m not “cured” but I am learning to live with health-anxiety and am enjoying going out with friends again. It took time, but I’ve found the right GP and therapist who let me voice my health worries whilst challenging me in a respectful way.

Untold Stories is an initiative coordinated by the UNSW Health Promotion Unit (HPU). The HPU team thank all the UNSW students and staff who have given us permission to share their stories.

Content Warning: Conversations about mental health and mental illness can sometimes be difficult but you don’t need to face it alone. Find the support you need by contacting UNSW Mental Health Connect.